i’ve been reading Never Let Me Go, for months. MONTHS! which for me, is like crazy. i blame the fact that i saw the movie first, and now there’s no mystery and i know how it’s gonna end, and that i will cry. so i decided to put it down for awhile, and start reading Looking For Alaska, that i bought recently, i started today and i’ve read like half of it. never watching the movie first again.

“i come here and imagine that this is the spot where everything i’ve lost since my childhood is washed out. i tell myself, if that were true, and i waited long enough then a tiny figure would appear on the horizon across the field and gradually get larger until i’d see it was Tommy. he’d wave. and maybe call. i don’t know if the fantasy go beyond that, i can’t let it. i remind myself i was lucky to have had any time with him at all. what i’m not sure about, is if our lives have been so different from the lives of the people we save. We all complete. Maybe none of us really understand what we’ve lived through, or feel we’ve had enough time.”